How to Eat A Flower

Step 1: Make sure that Momma is distracted. [NOTE: If you do not complete the first step, give it up. There will be no flower eating happening for you today.]

Step 2: Identify the flowers.

Step 3: Pick the exact flower that you want to dine on. Make sure that it looks nice and yummy.

Step 4: Quickly shove flower in mouth.

Step 5: Let the taste of the flower sit in your mouth; let it linger on your taste buds. Savor the moment.

Step 6: Realize that in no way does a flower taste even remotely delicious. Spit that sucker out.

Step 7: Forget the flower. Move onto the next menu item: Dirt.