Malapropism

Malapropism: (noun) the usually unintentionally humorous misuse or distortion of a word or phrase

The toddler has been going through the funniest phase right now. I'm going to recount a couple of stories so this momma can remember them. :)

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A couple weeks ago, I was in the kitchen making breakfast when the toddler ran in crying and holding his head.

"What's wrong, baby!?" I asked, bending down to comfort him.

"MOMMA!" he wailed, "I hurt my head!! I hurt my head!! I PROBABLY HURT MY HEAD!!!"

I'm pretty sure he definitely hurt his head, and I was most definitely laughing (on the inside, of course) at his adorable little sentence.

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This morning, the toddler was driving me bonkers. He'd gone to time-out already five or so times when he came into the laundry room where I was folding laundry. He was devastated because (stick with me here) his helicopter, which has a tow line on it, was attached to Lightning McQueen's spoiler in the wrong place.

"MOMMY! MOMMY! It's not at the right place! You have'ta fix it!!!!!"

I finished folding laundry, and turned around (praying, "Jesus, keep me calm, please, please, pretty please"). "Hey, hey, this is not a big deal, son. You need to calm down."

Well, that didn't work. "NO, MOMMY! It's not in the right place! You have'ta put him here! He has to be here! It's INTERESTING!!!"

He was screaming, red-faced, at this point. And, once again (don't judge), the word choice had me biting my lip to not burst out laughing. :)

Is there anything more draining/exhausting/demanding and hysterical than parenting a two-year-old!? ;)